thirty2flavors | how could this happen to meeeee?

MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE! MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE!

We should start a comm called whohighhorses or just highhorses where we can post polls on what the Doctor would definitely not do.

This could be the first poll:

What would the Doctor not do:

1. Impregnate the face of Boe
2. Change his name to John/Jamie/Horace/anything else besides Doctor
3. Have sexual relations with Donna *shudder*
4. Paint the TARDIS red
5. Go shopping with Jackie Tyler

6. Have a threesome with the Master and Jack

7. Vomit babies from his mouth
8. Regenerate into Billie Piper

9. Have a gaggle of tiembabiez with Rose and name them after famous physicists and/or random gods and goddesses.
10. Live happily ever after.

Haha that is BRILLIANT.

comfyhorses; we're not afraid to kick back, relax and be obnoxious.

We are just too ignorant to see the mystical force of the eyebrows. They (and only they, for they are magnificent arches of love and beauty. And I hear they also cure cancer.) have the power to melt the frozen hearts of a Time Lord. But seriously those things ALWAYS makes me wonder what I missed when watching. Like, where do they get the material to support for acting like that?

~~OMG STOP MAKING HIM WATCH HER SLEEP. IT IS CREEPY. DID TWILIGHT TEACH YOU NOTHING D: Also, sleeping people are really really boring.~~ HAH!! SO TRUUE. When did stalker behaviour turn into the most romantic thing ever? The only fics where Ten watching Rose sleep would make sense is if he then proceeded to wake her up and insult her inferior species for needing so much sleep, OR for her to make him tea because he's feeling peckish.

Yeah I feel the same way about Ten2, but I can't go around being as big of a jerk about lame characterization as Ten, because we don't know as much about Ten2. I still don't like it when he's like the polar opposite to Ten. I don't think I'll ever get over thinking "OMG NO HE'S STILL THE SAME AS TEN, WHYYY ARE YOU WRITING HIM LIKE A HARLEQUIN ROMANCE CHARACTER, WHY?"

LOL I haven't read any slash-fic in this fandom (unless Ten/Ten2 counts?) but I can imagine what they're like because they're probably written by the same people who writes Jack/Ianto.

Oooh do you remember which fic that was? I saw the s3 finale again yesterday and it sparked my interest in the Master.

The Master is very hard to write, which might explain why the best Master fics I've read are

orange_crushed pure crack stories... but they're hilarious. I mean they could totally be canon if you assumed it's a story read with fluff-glasses on. The tongue-in-cheek feel of it all is very WHO and I think the themes could be retold in a darker way.

11. MARRY A HUMAN, HEM HEM.

Psh you are assuming that when people write fic they pay attention to things like "staying in character"! That is just crazy talk. Fic is all wish-fulfillment and if the author thinks her eyebrows deserve praise, by God, Ten is going to praise Rose's eyebrows. Seriously though, what? Half the reason I ship Ten/Rose is because they're so adorably romantically incompetent.

Omg DAMN YOU MEYER for making people think it's romantic. At least, I guess, Ten wouldn't be tanding there thinking OMG SHE SMELLS SO GOOD I JUST WANT TO SUCK THE LIFE OUT OF HER BODY. But it's still creepy. And he's way too ADD to stnad there watching someone do nothing for 8 hours, even if it is precious precious Rose. I can see him being enough of a creeper to maybe check up on her every once in a while -- maybe at the end of s2 at the height of the ~storm approaching~ angst that is so overblown in fandom (srsly, do giggly Army of Ghosts Ten and Rose look like they fear some oncoming storm? No, they are skipping) -- but just in like a, "oh look she's still alive" sort of way.

Yeah I know, with Ten2 I just kind of have to grudgingly take ti, even if inside I am like NO THIS IS CLEARLY WRONG OBVIOUSLY I AM RIGHT. But yes I'm sure I'll never stop thinking OH MY GOD HE'S TEN WHY DON'T YOU PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT D: Also, I don't get why people think being "human" (but really "part-human" which everyone seems to ignore) would suddenly give him all these human instincts/whatever. Donna even SAYS that the reason neither of them thought of spinning the Daleks arund (LIRL) is because they lack that bit of human gut-instinct that she has. Because they are not human. Either of them. Ahhh.

Sometimes I read badfic and one of the badfics I was reading was like some AU JE thing and suddenly the Master showed up and got freaky with Ten. It was bizarre. But yeah that's about the extent of slash I've read in this fandom. Jack/Ten hurts my soul a little because rofl, Ten has so little interest in Jack, I don't get how people don't see that. At least with the Master it's like, quasi-canon.

It was The Space Between Opposites (http://www.whofic.com/viewstory.php?sid=28746). I ADORE this fic. Part of that is probably because I'm a linguistics minor and I find the way fic writers deal with Gallifreyan to be really interesting, and I really really like the way they deal with it in here. That said, I'm not sure it counts explicitly as slash. It's about as slashy as the s3 finale, which is to say "kindasortavery".

HM maybe I will go check those out. I havent' read that much with the Master because he's always some comic book villain, and while that may be what he was like in the older series (I don't know, I haven't seen any of them) and WAS what he was like in the Eight movie (omg, lol (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDKuGBYpP3Y)) it's not exactly what Simm's Master was like. He was a lulzy bastard but not really the "LET'S TIE HER TO THE TRAINTRACKS" type. He is the type who would like, force the Joneses and the Doctor to do a Christmas pageant for him.

12. Have relations with a previous or current incarnation of himself.
13. Wear a trucker hat with 'ONCOMING POUT' emblazoned on the front.

I like #10. the best though, because its sooooooo true.

And maybe he would do #13, its hard to say.

Let's do it! We could form teams (with which to have some sort of competitions) based on the different shades of David's velvet blazers/suits. I want to be team SexyMerlot.

I've never seen a picture that had the pants before.

Just... LIRL

It would make him nice and soft to hug, though.

Is it like Hogwarts houses? Like, "FIVE POINTS TO SHINY BRONZE (http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/01/22/article-1126633-0320B91E000005DC-537_468x740.jpg)?"

That picture never fails to make me giggle and I fear that I could look at it all day and still be amused. Do you think he's trying too hard, trying not at all, or trying just the perfect amount?

And yes, its exactly like Hogwarts houses. So five points to SHINY BRONZE but I'm going to have to say ten points to SEXYMERLOT because of the pants.

I have considered your question for a good few minutes now and I am no closer to an answer than I was a few minutes ago. I think I like to imagine his thought process as being something like "yes, I will wear a suit made entirely of merlot velvet to Billie Piper's wedding, WHAT OF IT?" but I don't know if that classifies as trying or not. I think it might be intentionally not trying, which is kind of like trying not to try, and I don't know how I feel about that.

Well naturally. I don't know I want to be Head of Shiny Bronze though, that's kind of like being Head of Hufflepuff or something.

He really throws me some curve balls with his personality/commentary/velvet suits. Its hard for me to get a handle on his personality. He is a bit of enigma because he's obviously a gigantico nerd, but yet he's always gigantico famous and millions of people are hot for him. It's very confusing. He throws all of my social mores out of whack.

On a note that is not really related: I got sorted into Hufflepuff at Hogwarts Elite! I thought it was kind of ridiculous. But then I embraced it, because really I don't want to be a Gryffindor because they all try way to hard, and I'm not even remotely a hero. Ravenclaws are cool I guess but I don't want all that pressure to be smart all the time... thats a lot of pressure, I would prefer to be clever in sporadic bursts. Slytherin would be nice, but I think I'm far to apathetic to be devious... so I guess I go with all the rest into Hufflepuff. ? IDK. I would just sit in an yellow armchair and consume vats of wine and plates of cheese from the kitchen.

On another note: Hogwarts Elite is boring, you go through all that trouble to get in and then its a big nonlulzy FAIL.

Ten points to Saucy Emerald, for cheer cheekiness. (I only assume it's green, I can't really tell.)
Then there's always Seductive Black

I read pants as in underwear and not trousers, lulz ensued. I don't like velvet though, it makes me think of carpets and I abhor them.

Shiny bronze also gets the shiny who-mobile.

ETA: Oops replied to the wrong entry, oh well. I also feel dirty for googling Mr. Tennant. I don't generally approve of such behaviour :(

Not gonna lie I tend to not fangirl actors/real people in general because I ...dunno, I just don't, but everything I've seen of him just makes me adore him, he seems very lulzy and big kid-ish and apparently I am immature because I think it is AWESOME. But yes, I do find the idea of scrawny white nerd having these huge legions of fangirls really hilarious.

I woudl be a Hufflepuff too by default. Because I am not brave or clever or cunning.

OMG. OMG YOU HAVE MADE MY LIFE BY SAYING THAT JSYK. The app is so pretentious I imagine they all sit around discussing Proust with Edward Cullen.

OH MY GOD THE SEDUCTIVE BLACK PHOTO WIHT A... SHINY STAR T-SHIRT AND A GIANT SKULL IN THE BACKGROUND LIRLLLl

His choice in clothing is so.... ...interesting.

I googled "velvet suit" once for my Omegling purposes and found a list some girl had made of reasons she loves David Tennant. Idk how to describe that experience.

Ahaha "Welcome to the metrosexual death eaters annual charity ball". On another note I approve of these houses.

o.O Dude. I think it's scary when people can't tell the difference between fangirling Ten and fangirling Tennant. It throws me even more when I say I obsess over Ten but not Tennant and people make it out like I'm the crazy one? LOL

VELVET UNDERWEAR!

I just googled velvet underwear and I guess its the name of some band on myspace.

No I don't enjoy googling real people. I think it is slightly creepy.

LOL YES. Voldemort would totally wear black velvet robes, you know it.

I think it would be fair to say I fangirl him, but my most fangirly is like, a zillion levels below some people's most fangirly. For me it means "I am more likely to watch something if he's in it and infrequently I watch interviews". It does not mean I regularly check out fansites or obsess over his favourite vegetable or something. And I totally get liking the character but not the actor, in general I am very apathetic towards actors.

Oh my god velvet underwear. ...Omg.

The only time I google people is if someone mentions them/they get cast in something I care about and I dunno who the hell they are.

Yeah I don't fangirl real people either. I think its slightly distasteful. It's one thing to be fangirly about fiction and quite another to be fangirly about actual people who have you know private lives. I remember back when ff.net was first started up and there were these huge sections filled with backstreet boys and nysnc fanfiction. I thought it was hilarious. And then I thought it was creepy.

Well cheers to us then, two perfectly nondescript Hufflepuffs, replete with safety scissors in hand and glitter stuck to our faces.

It really is boring. I thought that I would make like one million friends and have one million harry potter lulz, but nope. They did a friending meme last week and not one person wanted to be my friend, even though I told a really neat story about how I once got chased by the police and how I have four pairs of red shoes. In fact I think out of 200 only like 15 people even bothered to comment on the thing. Its all rather depressing. But don't tell, its probably supposed to be a secret.

RPF/"real person fiction" creeps me the fuck out, I find it so voyeuristic and just... all around... creepy. I am also quite perplexed by the idea of shipping real people. Especially if one of them is married with a newborn and a tattoo of her husband's name on her arm like a biker.

OMG I am so excited by that. I think we pissed them off with our fictional applications, they liked Dwight's but not Kelly's. I never did submit the Master's or the Doctor's because I figured the joke was getting old, but still, I loved how upset some people got.

I've decided sorting comms in general are full of shit. They all take themselves so seriously.

ooooooooooooooooooooo. I agree. Does she really have a tattoo like that. She is neat.

You should still do it. Whatever to pissing them off. Them who anyway? It's just a loose confederation of people who kind of have things in common, but not really. I'm going to sort the Master right into Hufflepuff, so that we can be friends and have evil dance parties together. Because he has STYLE and knows that life is wasted on the living.

Smeyer is like rule34 for fandoms only instead of porn there's destruction and general fail.

height of the ~storm approaching~ angst that is so overblown in fandom
I haven't encountered this tbh but I can see why it bothers you. Besides Ten and Rose were always too reckless and happy in each other's presence to think about any kind of consequence, it's more likely they'd think about it in silence and then distract each other with something silly.

Donna even SAYS that the reason neither of them thought of spinning the Daleks arund (LIRL) is because they lack that bit of human gut-instinct that she has.
TOTALLY. OH SO MUCH YES. I am quite disappointed that the major part of shipper-fandom has totally neglected to grasp this. It's almost as annoying as reading about a Ten2 who has forgotten how to speak anything but Gallifreyan and/or what his proper name is. WUT?

Hahahah oh god the Jack/Ten fics. The "best" ones are about how a depressed Ten comes onto Jack because he needs someone who can make him ~feel~ again. Like he ever cared about Jack in that way? It's more like he thinks of Jack as a stray dog who's had a rough life and he feels sympathy for it.

I am sure I'm going to miss most of the nuances of the fic because linguistics were never my forte, but thanks! I'm actually glad it's not slashy, IDK it just doesn't do it for me. I'm just on a hunt for more Master/Ten interaction like the phone-scene in tSoD

OMFG WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST WATCH? :D :D :D It makes me feel a deep spiritual satisfaction, and I also want to dress in drag if it can make me as fabulous as that.
Would the Doctor be Rudolph?

how could this happen to meeeee?

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